Relationship cannot be perfect in every aspect, but it is sparked and fueled with sex and desire. In the sex aspect, we can make a lot of improvements, and intimacy is the top priority. Experienced couples gradually develop their own code of intimate conduct, but initially it is useful to know the following general don’ts.
1. Don’t be shy in expressing your desires
You may have new great ideas or fantasies which will remain unrealized if you stay silent. Don’t demand, just suggest and inspire. Don’t make your partner feel responsible for your new wish, you may instead softly insist on trying it. Only after trying you will both adopt or not adopt the novelty.
2. Don’t be scornful
If something is wrong with your sensations, the problem may be in you. Just tell about your bad mood, pain or discomfort. Explain that it is your problem. If the problem is in your partner, discuss what you want very correctly. The worst thing during sex is scornful or harsh tone without any explanation.
3. Don’t get offended by comments
Your partner may be disposed to sex differently than you. Your moments of excitement do not necessarily coincide with your partner’s. If he or she just wants to postpone sex or change its course, respect his/her wish. As your relationship develops, elaborate compromises how to handle such controversies by using changed poses, adding fragrances, music, massage practices or special light to soften each other.
4. Don’t ignore pain
Being patient is good, but not for painful experience in sex. Pain is not quite normal, so inform your partner about it. If you are told about pain of your partner, stop your actions at once. Figure out mutually comfortable variants or seek a specialist’s advice.
5. Don’t leave indifference unnoticed
If your partner is not excited with your proven techniques to caress and delight, try to figure out why. Carefully enquire what he/she prefers and what is wrong this time. Don’t try to guess, the reason and its solution may be much simpler than you think. In turn, make mutually joyful interaction. Get involved in the process, respond to your partner’s initiative and eagerness.
6. Don’t be compulsive
Numerous experiments show that noone wants sexual intercourse 24/7. It especially concerns women who believe in the myth that the man should always want sex with a woman if he loves her. Love does not mean constant desire. So don’t reproach your partner for lack of activeness.
7. Don’t be too much focused on orgasm
Sex is first of all emotional joy and intimacy. It may be consummated by orgasm, but it is not always the case, particularly in women. Don’t get frustrated in case of failure. Failed orgasm does not mean faded feelings. First of all, orgasm requires mental relaxation, not love.
Modify your techniques, study your own body and your partner’s. Gradually you will come to an understanding how to consummate your intimacy. But don’t resort to imitated orgasm, don’t deceive yourself and your beloved one.
8. Don’t abuse alcohol if you want high-quality sex
If both participants are under the same degree of ebriety, sex between them most likely will not be bad. But it is highly probable that a sober partner will be exposed to compulsion of his/her drunken partner, which might result in forced intercourse. Sex under alcohol may disrupt trust and genuine affection.
9. Don’t let pets stay in the room during your private affair
It is a minor and peculiar rule, in contrast to the previous ones, but your pet may destroy your partner’s feeling of privacy. It will be enough for the spark of desire tom fade away.
Your code of sexual conduct may also include other don’ts, as well as do’s, but spontaneous and affectionate sexual action is the best way to strengthen romantic feelings.